Ernest Cadorin

Letting Go of Your Ego

2020/02/29

Unlocking Your Potential

The ego is the part of our psyche that is responsible for our sense of self-importance and self-esteem. It’s the reason we feel proud when we accomplish something and embarrassed when we fail, and it has a profound influence on our ability to make progress in karate and in our other endeavours. Sometimes it can motivate us to achieve great things, and other times it can prevent us from making the improvements we desire.

I enjoy sparring as much as I do kata, but that certainly wasn’t always the case. In the very early days of my training, as far as sparring was concerned, I preferred to sit back and watch rather than participate. I’m sure a lot of my reservations were the result of my not wanting to go up and look bad in front of the group, but by limiting the amount of sparring I did, I was limiting my development in an important aspect of the art. My ego was getting in the way of my progress.

My solution was simple: I started forcing myself to volunteer for sparring at every possible opportunity. When a group leader asked for volunteers, I didn’t hesitate, I didn’t wait to see who my opponent would be, and I didn’t give any thought to how I would fare. I just threw myself up there and que sera, sera. After a while, I started getting better from all the extra practice, and sparring became more enjoyable to me. (Go figure!)

Even when you are getting the practice you need, there are ways your ego can hold you back. When sparring, for example, if you always use the same tried-and-true techniques to win your matches, your repertoire will remain limited. If, on the other hand, you make an effort to experiment with different combinations, you may lose more matches in the short term, but you will improve over time as your repertoire expands.

Of course, the benefits of letting go of your ego for the greater good are not confined to the martial arts. This is something that can help you in school, in work, and in many other aspects of your life. There may be times, for example, when you require guidance from a teacher or a co-worker. For various reasons, some of them relating to pride, you may not want to approach that person to ask for help. This is nothing more than ego getting in the way of progress. If you can put it aside for a moment, you’ll be able to get the guidance you need and move forward.

I spent most of my career working as a software engineer and as the manager of a team of application designers. I liked my job, but at one point, I was offered the opportunity to work on a different team within my department. The team was being assembled to develop a new application that would make use of upgraded technology and updated development practices. Within this new environment, however, I would be working as a design team member rather than as the team’s manager.

I have to admit, there was a certain status that came with holding a management position in my department, and yes, I was a little reluctant to let that go. Nevertheless, I knew that this opportunity would allow me to gain valuable experience, so I set aside my ego and accepted the position. In the end, it was one of the best decisions I had ever made. I thoroughly enjoyed working in the new environment, and before long, I became the manager of the new design team. And all of this happened because I didn’t let my ego get in the way of what I knew would be good for me.

Sometimes you need to set aside your pride to achieve something you can be proud of.